MY COUNTRY GRANDMOTHER WAS BISCUITS AND MY CITY GRANDMOTHER, BECKERS ROLLS. MAMA BOUGHT COLONIAL BREAD FROM THE GROCERY. WHAT COULD I BE BUT A LIGHTBREAD GIRL?
Monday, March 09, 2009
Saturday, December 30, 2006
No more
Moving down the road to WordPress.
I'm leaving this here because of the import/export problems with pictures: WordPress accepts transfer of words from other blogs, but they have trouble with images. A little kinky there, but accessable.
This is where I'll be:
http://lightbread.wordpress.com/
I really miss my imported templates, Blogger.
I'm leaving this here because of the import/export problems with pictures: WordPress accepts transfer of words from other blogs, but they have trouble with images. A little kinky there, but accessable.
This is where I'll be:
http://lightbread.wordpress.com/
I really miss my imported templates, Blogger.
Thursday, July 13, 2006
Wednesday, July 12, 2006
Mexican Restaurant
The Rodeo is one of our favorite Mexican restaurants. I am not saying that the food is fabulous; it is good, though, in a sort of homestyle way. Family-owned. Nice people. The way Nashville has changed in that way alone in the last few years still astounds me. When I finished college, there were no Mexican restaurants around, and if there were any Latin people here, they were cloistered away safely at Vanderbilt or Peabody, or maybe Scarritt. My high school Spanish teacher had learned in...Spain.
There was one boy in my third year class who invited us to his home for dinner; his parents had been missioneries in Cuba. I remember we had arroz con pollo, which was very exotic for me. thank god it was chicken and not paella.
Didn't have the restaurant experience until I moved to St Petersburg. So cosmopolitan. Besides an enormous 24/7 deli, they had greek, italian, chinese, and...Taco Bell. Cheaper than the coney island hot dog behind the liquor store and much safer. It's funny, there was another chain Mexican restaurant just across the street from Taco Bell, Taco Tico, but we never went there. No idea why.
Thursday, March 16, 2006
Wednesday, September 21, 2005
Thursday, September 15, 2005
Dickson Farm

Lilac in May. Behind that is the potato house. The potatoes were in bushel baskets on a platform off the dirt floor, and Mamaw's canning was on rough plank shelves along the wall by the door. It smelled like clean dirt and creek banks and shade.

Smokehouse. After the cold had settled in, more than just a frost or two, they'd slaughter some hogs. For days the house smelled of it. My grandmother made sausage and they salted hams and slabs of bacon. While the meat was fresh there were pork chops and, my favorite still, tenderloin, and my grandmother grumbled and worried at us all not to make ourselves sick eating all that fresh meat. When the smoking started, it was small, slow fires of hickory, banked to burn long and smoky. The cracks were stopped up in the building and all that smoke permeated the wood as much as the meat, so that long afterward the scent stayed. Before I saw this picture, I had been wondering where apples came from: that's an apple tree there in front of the garden. That's Daddy with the Camel in his hand and Glenn with the lapful of puppies.

Corn crib and the barn pond. The corn crib was built like a log cabin, notched logs. It was set up off the ground and there was metal flashing around to keep rats out of the corn that was supposed to go to feed the chickens and hogs. There was a sort of lean to on either side of the main section. One side sheltered some tools like the plow and cultivator, and the other side held the wagon. We decorated the walls of the shed with pages torn from magazines and catalogues borrowed from the outhouse, stuck them onto nailheads and splinters. The wagon itself could be anything or nothing more than a place to climb or to sit and be dusty away from grownups.

This is from Uncle Will's room, which was part of our play ground. Not very strong on private property. That's Larry Joe with the BB gun. Chicken house, some old saw I never saw in use, potato house. The BB gun reminds me: The steps to the upstairs were just framed, not finished, and between the studs people hung spare overalls and jackets and there was always a 410 and a 22 leaning there with shells and bullets on a ledge above them. All the kids there were running around and not one of us bothered the guns. The closest we ever came to that was when we found some shotgun shells in Uncle Will's foot locker and proceeded to drop them one by one into the well [which was shallow and rock-lined] in the hope that one would go off like a cap pistol. The shells didn't go off, but our mothers did.
Dickson County City Girl
Here are a few I didn't take myself, the only ones with me in them:

Me with Papaw Yates. The well is in the background. The oak tree beside us was the most important thing in the yard. My cousins and I played cowboys and Indians around it (I wanted to be an Indian when I grew up). My Uncle Will's funeral was held in its shade. Nothing much grew around it, but then it wasn't a very fertile farm. Two mules, four or five cows for milk and butter and heifers to sell, hogs to butcher when it was cold enough.

Uncle Will, Wilburn, was a batchelor, which was a shame because he was better with kids than any of his brothers (and among them they had plenty). He took care of the farm for my grandparents. He had hound dogs: fox hounds and coon hounds, and he and his neighbors went out on clear fall nights and listened to the dogs run. They'd have a fire and tell lies and (I have reason to suspect) pass around a Mason jar. The only thing I knew him to bring back from one of those evenings was a fox kit in a burlap sack. He brought it into the living room and tipped it out onto the floor. It was small and scared and I wanted to make a pet of it. Uncle Will used his pen knife to cut a chew of tobacco off a plug and with the same knife whittled bits of twig to fit in spools for me to use as twirling tops or dolls. He died after he got caught in the rain riding my mare Gypsy to McEwen to be bred, and my grandmother blamed the horse, not being the sort to blame the child. During his wake the men sat out all night in folding chairs in the front yard and the women in the front room. It was all a quiet buzz. Upstairs, I couldn't sleep. I'd look out the front window and watch the cigarettes flare and burn, go out, and start up again.
Me. Coming and going.

Wednesday, September 14, 2005
Dickson County Farm
Ordinarily I use this site for dribs and dabs of memories, but I was looking for a photo the other day and ran across a stack of shapshots taken at the farm in Dickson County, what we called "down at the country." Since my modem is slow, I'll just post a few at a time. There are quite a few.

My Grandparents. I'm not sure of the date, but believe the building behind them was the "old house". When my father and his brothers came back from WWII, they built them a new one. James and Mary. To me they were Mamaw and Papaw Yates, and if he looks less than cheerful to you, that's the only way I ever saw him. By the time I was old enough to notice, he rarely spoke, ate little more than cornbread soaked in buttermilk, and had violent spells. Truth to tell, no one seemed heartbroken when he passed, least of all my grandmother, who had been putting up with it for too long.
My grandmother was very short and round with thin hair she never cut because "hair is woman's crown and glory". She always said she was Dutch, but even excluding the wars with the Deutsch folk, there is a lot of variation among the people labeled Dutch. She worked. Hard. Liked to read when she could. There were always farm magazines around, and Reader's Digests and the Digest joke books, but she stashed novels in her little bedroom off the back porch. Named her two daughters Carmen and Harriet Arlena Maria. She milked by hand, churned, cooked on a wood stove, drew all her water from a well in the front yard, gardened and canned, raised and killed and plucked her own chickens, and would make a special jam cake for me in a little heart-shaped pan--no icing. The cake in her lap is probably coconut.

My Grandparents. I'm not sure of the date, but believe the building behind them was the "old house". When my father and his brothers came back from WWII, they built them a new one. James and Mary. To me they were Mamaw and Papaw Yates, and if he looks less than cheerful to you, that's the only way I ever saw him. By the time I was old enough to notice, he rarely spoke, ate little more than cornbread soaked in buttermilk, and had violent spells. Truth to tell, no one seemed heartbroken when he passed, least of all my grandmother, who had been putting up with it for too long.
My grandmother was very short and round with thin hair she never cut because "hair is woman's crown and glory". She always said she was Dutch, but even excluding the wars with the Deutsch folk, there is a lot of variation among the people labeled Dutch. She worked. Hard. Liked to read when she could. There were always farm magazines around, and Reader's Digests and the Digest joke books, but she stashed novels in her little bedroom off the back porch. Named her two daughters Carmen and Harriet Arlena Maria. She milked by hand, churned, cooked on a wood stove, drew all her water from a well in the front yard, gardened and canned, raised and killed and plucked her own chickens, and would make a special jam cake for me in a little heart-shaped pan--no icing. The cake in her lap is probably coconut.
Wednesday, September 07, 2005
Cold Coffee
Writing. I took a sip of coffee. Not sure just how long it's been sitting here, but it tastes like cold woodsmoke.
Sunday, September 04, 2005
Labor Day Weekend--Dickson, Tennessee
There are some times more than others when I miss family. Labor Day weekend is one. Funny that it's not the Forth. They were both big Yates family get-together days, probably still are, just I haven't been to anything since Daddy died. I got asked to Uncle Tom and Aunt Dot's anniversary a few years back but I was in one of my intend-well, do nothing modes and not only didn't do the gift thing I had planned, I didn't even RSVP when I realized there was no way I could manage it all. I know why I am all family fractured. Don't know why Glenn doesn't keep up with anybody but Aunt Harriet.
Still, I miss them all now, or maybe miss the people we used to be.
We would run around acting crazy and generally making nuisances of ourselves. We'd chase each other around and over the loose hay and baled in the barn loft and sit there with daring, dangling our feet out the wide loft window. There were tadpoles in the pond to catch and kittens to scratch the daylights out of us when we tried. Green persimmons were for shoving onto the end of sticks and flinging as far as we could.
After we ate, in the long afternoon's heat, there was Yellow Creek to go to. Clear as pale green glass, sparkling with minnows, and fed by springs said to be 52 degrees the year round. I couldn't swear to the temperature, only know that the first dip in would take your breath and there wasn't anyone, man, woman or child who didn't have to climb, blue-lipped and shivering, out onto the rock to thaw in the hot sun. And repeat until exhaustion made us cross and we were hauled back up to the house to shuck out of wet bathing suits in the hot, tin-roofed attic with its blue-black dirt daubers. We would collapse up there. I could still feel the movement of the water around me in my sleep.
Still, I miss them all now, or maybe miss the people we used to be.
We would run around acting crazy and generally making nuisances of ourselves. We'd chase each other around and over the loose hay and baled in the barn loft and sit there with daring, dangling our feet out the wide loft window. There were tadpoles in the pond to catch and kittens to scratch the daylights out of us when we tried. Green persimmons were for shoving onto the end of sticks and flinging as far as we could.
After we ate, in the long afternoon's heat, there was Yellow Creek to go to. Clear as pale green glass, sparkling with minnows, and fed by springs said to be 52 degrees the year round. I couldn't swear to the temperature, only know that the first dip in would take your breath and there wasn't anyone, man, woman or child who didn't have to climb, blue-lipped and shivering, out onto the rock to thaw in the hot sun. And repeat until exhaustion made us cross and we were hauled back up to the house to shuck out of wet bathing suits in the hot, tin-roofed attic with its blue-black dirt daubers. We would collapse up there. I could still feel the movement of the water around me in my sleep.
The End Is Cold
The end supposes the beginning. The dog wags the tail or the tail wags the dog. There was a trail down the hollow when I was a little girl, but the trail went under the barbed wire fence that was rusted so badly it was about to fall apart and sagging so low that even a little girl could wind up with snagged pants if she tried to slip underneath it. I know, because I did try, and lost it in the end. It is hard to extricate oneself from barbed wire when all alone in a ditch. I wondered what would have happened. Could I wind up stuck there forever? Would snakes come and tickle my ankles. Would spiders build webs in my hair? Would the birds laugh at my problem? Would the squirrels swear at my being in their back yard? Would the foxes come at night and bark at me.
The foxes in the hills around my grandmother's did bark. I heard them before, in the nights when I crawled out of my nest of four quilts, so heavy I could hardly breathe beneath them, much less move, having to pee, hating the little chamber pot under the bed because it was so easy to miss. I would pad barefoot out of the cold front bedroom through the living room where my grandmother slept in her rocker beside the banked stove. She could not sleep lying down; asthma, she said. Open the door, open the screen, creaking but quiet, onto the smooth concrete front porch.
Outside the smell of hickory woodsmoke filled the air. The air was still and frigid, cracking. There was no sound nearby, no birds, the dogs all in their house curled in a warm ball together, the chickens in their coop all puffed (no baby chicks yet beneath light bulbs, in a month or two the mail order peepers will come). No one about but me and the moon, making hard shadows, and off in the distance up the hill past the hollow with the tiny creek and the barbed wire, the foxes, not like dogs at all, calling out the cold night. Then I went to the moon, shaking scared of the foxes and chilled and pulled down my pants to pee steam off the edge of the porch.
The foxes in the hills around my grandmother's did bark. I heard them before, in the nights when I crawled out of my nest of four quilts, so heavy I could hardly breathe beneath them, much less move, having to pee, hating the little chamber pot under the bed because it was so easy to miss. I would pad barefoot out of the cold front bedroom through the living room where my grandmother slept in her rocker beside the banked stove. She could not sleep lying down; asthma, she said. Open the door, open the screen, creaking but quiet, onto the smooth concrete front porch.
Outside the smell of hickory woodsmoke filled the air. The air was still and frigid, cracking. There was no sound nearby, no birds, the dogs all in their house curled in a warm ball together, the chickens in their coop all puffed (no baby chicks yet beneath light bulbs, in a month or two the mail order peepers will come). No one about but me and the moon, making hard shadows, and off in the distance up the hill past the hollow with the tiny creek and the barbed wire, the foxes, not like dogs at all, calling out the cold night. Then I went to the moon, shaking scared of the foxes and chilled and pulled down my pants to pee steam off the edge of the porch.
Saturday, August 27, 2005
Harold---The Loud Memory
First ( and close to the last) time I colored my hair was while I was in summer school. [I spent several college summers anywhere but at home, come to think of it] Anyway. I have no idea what my hair really looked like, but within minutes of drying it, I was bouncing out into the bright summer light just in time for Harold to see it. He stopped his Volkswagen on its nose, bounded over to me, and screeched for the entirety of Jefferson County: "My Gawd! It's Whore of Babylon Red!"
Wednesday, August 24, 2005
Sunday Drives
We used to take Sunday drives, my mother, her mother and I (and later my baby brother grew to challenge me for the post of Navigator). While the men in their respective houses napped, we explored the nearby world and took possession of byways renaming them "that road with the cedars and goats" or "out by the cider stand" and "where was that lake up Germantown Hill?". We drove by whim from the beginning to the end. "Let's take a drive" began it, usually my mother, the only driver in the group. From there direction was anyone's choice, mine more often than not since my grandmother seemed content with the ride and whatever she and Mama talked about. Very early I learned to vary the directions of my turns to avoid wandering in circles. That was my only rule.
Friday, October 08, 2004
Aunt Sis
My Aunt, Carmen, was the only girl in the family for a long time before Harriet came along, and she was usually just called "Sis" or "Sister" by the six boys she helped raise. I always called her "Aunt Sis" and never thought twice about the oddity of it. It's possible that her given name simply didn't fit her well. My grandmother was either Dutch as she said or Deutsch, a short, round woman, but she must have loved Spanish-sounding names for her girls since she named the other "Harriet Arlena Maria". Big, chunky Carmen with her thin yellow-blonde hair looked much more Teutonic than anything else.
It's odd how little about the woman herself stands out for me. Somehow I seem to not have liked her very much, although it might have been that she and my mother didn't care for one another. Maybe not. Maybe it was just that she was such a country woman. My grandmother was country, too, but there was a bit of leavening about her.
Aunt Sis was married twice but never had any children. I don't remember much at all about her second husband, probably because when they married they moved "away over Bon Aqua way" and so wasn't around the homeplace quite as much. I have the vaguest memory of a suspicion that she was much happier that way. Perhaps it was just that she had finally caught her a man who'd given her a real little house with city plumbing.
She must have been something of an old maid when she married the first time. My early memories of her are along the lines of "young wife", even though she was older than any of the others except Uncle Jethro. I liked her first husband. Probably because of his name. You have to understand the accent I grew up with, and it is difficult to convey, but it is nothing like the "Southern" you hear in movies and on TV; not much like Clinton's, although that is closer. A bit like East Texas with a little lilt to it, very sing-song, flat a's and hard r's. So that Thomas Lamasters came out as something like Tom-miss la-Mas-Tiss. He was usually called by his full name,too, probably to distinguish him from my uncle John Thomas (sometimes called "John" and sometimes "Tom" and by his wife, "Johnny"), and the however many other Toms and Thomases there were in the area.
They first lived with his father in a cabin right up at the source of Yellow Creek, where the gravel road was little more than a wagon trace crossing the creek. It was an old cabin, around a hundred years, and looked more like a shed than a house. It was what I believe is called single pen, but separated into two rooms with the old man's room in the back, a curtain made from flour sack covering the doorway. Aunt Sis and Uncle Thomas had their bed in the front room, which was also the kitchen and living room. The foundation was undressed rock, and there was a distinct list to the place. There was no well, so water had to be carried from the creek, upstream of the place where the road crossed it. The water bucket hung from the porch post, a knobby bark-peeled thing, smooth with wear. Above the bucket there was a nail for hanging the long handled gourd dipper. My grandmother's dipper was tin and gave the water a metallic taste I was used to. Drinking from the gourd was different; the taste was flat, but the texture was unlike anything else. An adventure. I think that even at the time I considered the place exotic.
Later, whether to have a life of their own, or because the old man had died, I can't remember, they moved down the road a bit, to rent the dogtrot house across from the Primitive Baptist Church by the bridge. A dogtrot is sort of like two cabins under one roof with a breezeway in between. This one had porches running the length of the house both front and back, and was sited beneath a huge, upright oak. It was simple, but comfortable. They couldn't have lived there very long, though, before he died and she moved back to live with my grandmother.
That's the way I remember it. I may be wrong.
It's odd how little about the woman herself stands out for me. Somehow I seem to not have liked her very much, although it might have been that she and my mother didn't care for one another. Maybe not. Maybe it was just that she was such a country woman. My grandmother was country, too, but there was a bit of leavening about her.
Aunt Sis was married twice but never had any children. I don't remember much at all about her second husband, probably because when they married they moved "away over Bon Aqua way" and so wasn't around the homeplace quite as much. I have the vaguest memory of a suspicion that she was much happier that way. Perhaps it was just that she had finally caught her a man who'd given her a real little house with city plumbing.
She must have been something of an old maid when she married the first time. My early memories of her are along the lines of "young wife", even though she was older than any of the others except Uncle Jethro. I liked her first husband. Probably because of his name. You have to understand the accent I grew up with, and it is difficult to convey, but it is nothing like the "Southern" you hear in movies and on TV; not much like Clinton's, although that is closer. A bit like East Texas with a little lilt to it, very sing-song, flat a's and hard r's. So that Thomas Lamasters came out as something like Tom-miss la-Mas-Tiss. He was usually called by his full name,too, probably to distinguish him from my uncle John Thomas (sometimes called "John" and sometimes "Tom" and by his wife, "Johnny"), and the however many other Toms and Thomases there were in the area.
They first lived with his father in a cabin right up at the source of Yellow Creek, where the gravel road was little more than a wagon trace crossing the creek. It was an old cabin, around a hundred years, and looked more like a shed than a house. It was what I believe is called single pen, but separated into two rooms with the old man's room in the back, a curtain made from flour sack covering the doorway. Aunt Sis and Uncle Thomas had their bed in the front room, which was also the kitchen and living room. The foundation was undressed rock, and there was a distinct list to the place. There was no well, so water had to be carried from the creek, upstream of the place where the road crossed it. The water bucket hung from the porch post, a knobby bark-peeled thing, smooth with wear. Above the bucket there was a nail for hanging the long handled gourd dipper. My grandmother's dipper was tin and gave the water a metallic taste I was used to. Drinking from the gourd was different; the taste was flat, but the texture was unlike anything else. An adventure. I think that even at the time I considered the place exotic.
Later, whether to have a life of their own, or because the old man had died, I can't remember, they moved down the road a bit, to rent the dogtrot house across from the Primitive Baptist Church by the bridge. A dogtrot is sort of like two cabins under one roof with a breezeway in between. This one had porches running the length of the house both front and back, and was sited beneath a huge, upright oak. It was simple, but comfortable. They couldn't have lived there very long, though, before he died and she moved back to live with my grandmother.
That's the way I remember it. I may be wrong.
Sunday, October 03, 2004
I Never Sang For M.I.C.K.E.Y.
It is a beautiful October day, and oh, yes I do love October. If I could sing it right, then I would sing.
When I was eight or nine or ten, I sang. In the back yard, I sang, swinging. And, Joan, my next-door neighbor and I used the doghouse roof as a stage for song and dance numbers. (A favorite was the Gillette Razor Theme Song from the Friday Night Fights.) The picnic table was off limits because, "somebody might want to eat on there some day." I remember wanting the car windows down so when I sang the Mickey Mouse Club Talent Scouts would be able to hear me. I liked Doris Day in the fifties.
I wasn't the only one around the house who sang. My Mama did, too. But only when she was depressed or angry. I don't know why. She must have liked music, she had played french horn in one of her high school marching bands and had a letter. (Mama tended to get kicked out of schools. She had a temper.) But when she was singing around the house, or whistling, she usually chose bad hymns and--not blues--depressing songs, like "... if I had the wings of an angel, over these prison walls I would fly." She rarely knew whole sets of words, and so would sing what she did know over and over again. To this day, hearing someone begin to whistle in the house for no reason makes me want to find a place to cower. I wonder what will follow.
There is only one time I remember Daddy singing. I'd been with him down to Dickson to see the relatives. Mama and Glenn had stayed in town for some reason. It was late summer and within a week or two I would be going away to college. Going away anywhere for the first time. At some point, about three quarters of the way home, he started up on "Red River Valley".
So, I suppose somewhere along the line it impressed itself on me that singing (outside of the irrepressible beer drenched crowd tuning in a bar or the spirit soaked counterpart Sunday morning) has to be laden with important emotion. Something heavy.
When I was eight or nine or ten, I sang. In the back yard, I sang, swinging. And, Joan, my next-door neighbor and I used the doghouse roof as a stage for song and dance numbers. (A favorite was the Gillette Razor Theme Song from the Friday Night Fights.) The picnic table was off limits because, "somebody might want to eat on there some day." I remember wanting the car windows down so when I sang the Mickey Mouse Club Talent Scouts would be able to hear me. I liked Doris Day in the fifties.
I wasn't the only one around the house who sang. My Mama did, too. But only when she was depressed or angry. I don't know why. She must have liked music, she had played french horn in one of her high school marching bands and had a letter. (Mama tended to get kicked out of schools. She had a temper.) But when she was singing around the house, or whistling, she usually chose bad hymns and--not blues--depressing songs, like "... if I had the wings of an angel, over these prison walls I would fly." She rarely knew whole sets of words, and so would sing what she did know over and over again. To this day, hearing someone begin to whistle in the house for no reason makes me want to find a place to cower. I wonder what will follow.
There is only one time I remember Daddy singing. I'd been with him down to Dickson to see the relatives. Mama and Glenn had stayed in town for some reason. It was late summer and within a week or two I would be going away to college. Going away anywhere for the first time. At some point, about three quarters of the way home, he started up on "Red River Valley".
This from my never-affectionate, barely expressive father. Don't ask me what I said. I was seventeen and conversation with Daddy usually turned on books and bicycles and fishing, anything but emotion.From this valley they say you are going.
I will miss your bright eyes and sweet smile.
For they say you are taking the sunshine
That has brightened our pathway awhile.Come and sit by my side if you love me.
Do not hasten to bid me adieu
But remember the Red River Valley
And the cowboy that loves you so true.
So, I suppose somewhere along the line it impressed itself on me that singing (outside of the irrepressible beer drenched crowd tuning in a bar or the spirit soaked counterpart Sunday morning) has to be laden with important emotion. Something heavy.
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